Friday, October 3, 2008

listening

Watching my father take on a triple bypass has changed me. I am not sure exactly how but I do know that nothing is the same. My endless ability to put things off is not working anymore; my lack of solid commitment in certain areas is not working anymore and the fantasy idea that I have all the time in the world to get myself sorted is most definitely not working anymore. But honestly, I feel a tad overwhelmed. Where does one start when they want to make huge changes? Where does one find peace, courage, commitment, perseverance? As I write this I know it is within. I know I must get silent and I know I must push past the voice of the ego and listen for the voice of inspiration. Sshhhhh……

The universe is reaching out to me in mysterious ways and trying to figure out what I need to do is driving me a little crazy. That is part of the reason for the delay in writing here. Not really knowing what to say. It seems that circumstances are presenting themselves that will enable me to concentrate on myself, something I find very hard to do. Give me your problem and I will help you solve it, give me your pain and I will help soothe it, give me your fear and I will help you gather courage but faced with my own life I become paralyzed as if expressing what I need to will kill me. Man, that damn ego is one powerful piece of work.

I am praying for guidance, if you have some, let me know.

Love

Alison

1 comment:

Janet Summit said...

I love thinking about emotions. Sometimes those tender things that happen - like illness, surgeries, etc. can really make our feelings awaken -- and give us a time to examine our hearts. It's times like that that help me remember how important it is to connect with others -- and to leave a legacy.....etc.

My first baby passed away when he was almost a year old. I went through five years of very intense grief and anguish. It was several years after that when I read an article written by a nurse specializing in grief counseling. She talked about the cycles of grief. I never knew anything about emotions before, and it was so healing to know what I was feeling, and why.

Now my husband and I teach classes on the subject of understanding emotions. I really believe that it is the most important thing we can do. Our emotions involve a feeling and a thought -- and when we understand what those are, our actions change, our abilities change, our lives change. It's been an amazing journey.

Thanks for sharing your feelings. We have a blog where we talk about those kinds of feelings, and it's been fun to connect to others and see that we're all very similar in how we feel about things. You're welcome to check that out!

Janet Summit
www.peacethroughprinciples.com