Want an empowering way to take care of yourself? Would you like something that commands respect, staves off intimidation, enables time for your passions, makes resentment disappear, nurtures your self-worth, your body, your time, your health, your life and your soul?
It is the word “no”. Inside this tiny little word lay a million possibilities.
When I use this word too little something remarkable happens. I enter a cycle of self-destruction. See if you recognize this cycle: First I will agree to something that takes away from my time, my peace of mind, my money or my health, then I realize, by doing the agreed upon task, that I have put myself in jeopardy. Then I resent the person or people involved, usually the one who asked in the first place. Then I engage in some form of self-destructive behaviour because I am not really mad at them at all. I am really mad at me, and instead of facing that fact, I act it out. While I am acting, my ego is having a field day telling me how wrong they are and how they should be able to see what I need without me telling them and that they are inconsiderate and that I would never do that to them….sounds like a whiny, crying, baby, victim doesn’t it?
Because it is.
We teach people how to treat us and every time we say ‘yes’ when we really mean ‘no’ we teach them that their time, energy, talent, peace of mind etc, is more important than ours. When my actions and thoughts are out of alignment with my spirit I feel bad. And living with the consequences of too many yeses and not enough no’s definitely feels bad.
Now, the good news. Yesterday when I was knee deep in that cycle I saw it. As I searched for something unhealthy to eat, I found instead the insight to see what I had created. The cravings went away, the inner anger started to dissipate and I remembered that my happiness depends on me, not on what anyone else does or doesn’t do, just me.
Awesome!
Alison


